As I See It

Christmas has always been my least favorite major holiday. I think it goes back to when I was eight-years-old and my Christmas was ruined by poor gift-giving on the part of my parents. Childhood scars run so deep. I was a feisty, fun-loving kind of child. I had little use for fancy things or grown-up sensibilities. I liked imaginative play and the outdoors. So, when my parents got me diamond earrings and a jewelry box, I was a little disappointed. Scratch that, I was pissed. What could I do with those? Then, on top of my snub, my older brother received every stupid thing on his blasted list. Yep, everything. I was also a very mischievous and vindictive sort of kid, so, not content to just stew on my own, I tried to ruin his and my parents Christmas as well. Yeah, I was a peach. Thank the Lord for maturity and spiritual discipline. I have mostly left that sort of behavior behind. Mostly.

Of course there are things I love about this time of year. I love the smell in the air as it chills. I love drinking wassail and eating sweets until I swear I will never eat another sweet again. I love playing Mexican Train with my family, getting through three rounds before it breaks down in a quarrel of accusation and competitiveness. I love that this time of year there is always something fun to do, always something pretty to see. Over the years my beef with Christmas has dwindled into a mere annoyance. It has become less a problem of my wish-list and more an issue with overspending and commercialization. Most years I come away from celebrating with a depleted bank account and an unsettling sense of emptiness about the whole thing, which I quickly brush off as indigestion. Even for me, a believer, the holiday feels more like a shit storm of gifts and food, and less like a celebration of Jesus, family, and our blessings.

The other day I read an article about the Obamas’ and their “non-religious” celebration of the season, and some of my less attractive feelings about Christmas came screaming back. Our new “people’s President” has decided not to display the 18th Century Nativity Scene in front of the White House this year. This nativity has been displayed by every other President since the mid 1700’s, but Mr. Change thinks himself above that. Though you know he would never put it that way. Which brings me to my first major problem: Why are we celebrating Christmas as an either-or-holiday anyway?

Christmas has become another opportunity for people to segregate themselves. Either you believe Christmas needs Christ in it or you are just doing it for the gifts and merriment. Drunkenness and commercialization, or Religious introspection and piety. It’s so annoying I could just skip it. What about believing that, first of all, Jesus wasn’t born in December surrounded by Santa, a Christmas tree, and a bunch of tinsel; and second, believing it’s OK to just celebrate. Because, lets face it, the way we celebrate this holiday in America is just as much about Santa and his sleigh as it is about Jesus and the manger.

Christmas needs to be about the gathering of those dear to you. It shouldn’t be a statement of your faith, because that tarnishes your faith if it is. We don’t have to make a declaration about the state of our soul by taking a stance at Christmas. Pagans celebrate Christmas. Atheists put up lights and sing carols. No, Christmas needs to be about showing love to others, to those important to you, to strangers, to enemies.

Do we really need one more thing to separate us in this country? I used to work at a title company where most of my co-workers weren’t believers, or were seriously good at hiding it. I loved these people. They were real, funny, edgy, and full of strange beliefs and interesting anecdotes. And every year at Christmas we gave each other gifts. We put up a tree in the office. We sent out a card to our customers. There was no big discussion about whether or not the holiday we were celebrating was a “Christian thing” or a “Non-Christian thing”. Our belief system didn’t separate us because we chose to respect each other enough to not make it an issue, to not bring it up.

Respect becomes the problem. We have an issue in this country with respect. I don’t like to parade my opinions as fact, nor do I like to argue a point. I find the whole task of converting someone to my way of thinking kind of tedious, and, frankly, and little futile. However, many Americans, especially those in entertainment and politics, seem to think it is their job to make everyone feel the same way about things, all the while hiding behind a guise of individuality and the right to personal freedom.

To a degree I agree with that. I believe we all have the right to do whatever we want, God gave us free will. But, I also believe, within that right we must respect each other and ourselves. I do not agree with a lot of decisions I see people making. I do not believe that the choices of many are wise, but I do believe it is not for me to judge, only to remain true to my own belief within a corrupt world. It is my responsibility to raise my son accordingly. It is not my responsibility to condemn. God gave us a guide to a fruitful life, it’s up to us to follow it.

Tolerance is important. I am not someone who believes I know everything. (I know a lot. I’m very wise.) Only God knows everything. When you think about Christmas this year, I implore you to try something that may be a little different. Be a believer who loves those who aren’t. Or be someone who isn’t a believer and tolerate those who are. Christmas is a celebration of family and friends. We give because we love each other, not because we are Christians and not because we aren’t. I gave gifts to my coworkers, not because we stood together on the side of the line that said, “Keep Christ in Christmas”, but because they touched my life throughout the year and I wanted them to know.

If I had been wise beyond my years, I would have been thankful beyond comprehension that my parents gave me something so special when we had so little. As I have grown up I have learned that every gift has a purpose, and the purpose of Christmas isn’t material gifts, it’s something deeper. It’s showing you know someone. It’s honoring relationship. It’s blessing. It’s being blessed. This year, don’t be like Obama and make Christmas a political issue. Make it a love issue.